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Delhi, Delhi A cool dude from Africa. Yash, 29 years. Delhi, Central Delhi, Delhi Hey hi dear. I assumed he was talking about weed but on talking to him further, he told me that he could also arrange for a room to ensure privacy. Then I came to know that there were college students who were willing to sleep with men.
They were mostly boys from small towns who needed money and dreamt of a luxurious lifestyle. But if money seems to be the biggest motivation for these straight MSM, why would they just not hook up with women? Maybe because talking about sex or asserting their right over sexual pleasure is still fairly uncommon for women in India, especially in rural and semi-urban spaces.
Finding other gay men is easier due to apps and social media. A lot of his clients are also closeted gay men who are married to women. Ranjit himself is married since a year. I lie to be able to feed my family, and this is not really too tough. Most of the men I spoke with had profiles on not just Grindr but also used Facebook and WhatsApp to get in touch with potential customers. It helps me set some rules with people I meet.
My job has made my life much better. I can now afford eating out and even a house to rent. I do believe though that some of these men are experimenting with their sexuality rather than just getting on the apps to earn money—a recurring answer to my question on why they do what they do, asked to about a dozen of these men. It does beg the obvious question: And if you enjoy doing what you do, why not just identify as bi or fluid?
Is that why many men still choose to stay in the closet? He is an extremely good-looking man, looking slightly scruffy in a way that becomes him.
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His posts usually show him shirtless. He shows me how he is a part of several groups on Facebook and WhatsApp that help sex workers like him find work. Through multiple fake profiles, he approaches people while securing his personal identity. Of course I feel different levels of sexual pleasure with different people but I prefer to not get emotionally involved. I may not have many friends outside my secret life but some of my clients have gone beyond their role and have established their part in my life.